Verbum Significatum

Jailhouse Blues

This whole mess started with a simple assignment. “Investigate for clues on a string of murders.” Should have been simple enough. It’s routine for me now, something I’ve done. Over and over again.

When I got to my destination, I encountered a quaint butler who couldn’t decide on his damn accent. I still have no idea where the guy is from. Regardless, he directed me to a table with a heavily armed bearded man already seated. Later, I came to know him as Murphy, and I’m pretty sure he hates me for some reason.

Upon taking my seat, hardly any time passed before the lights went out. Of course, I got up and starting searching for any hints as to what happened nearly immediately. Murphy followed suit, and we were unspoken companions. As we walked down the hall, looking for anything and anyone, there was a single room with a glow. Inside was this tiny guy, looked about 18 or 19. Apparently he was hired on for security detail, much to Murphy’s shock. He pulled up the breaker room on the computer screen, something I could have never done. I don’t know a damn thing about computers. What we saw shocked all three of us.

On the screen was a weird looking bird creature. Disregarding how strange this was, I supposed it to be a costume and went to the breaker room. All I found was a feather, slick with some strange black goo. That’s when the shrieks started.

The three of us decided to head up to the roof to check everything out. And with all of his wisdom, Vince opened the door. All the way. The bird immediately saw us and gave chase. We took a couple shots at it, but the bird was not phased. So, I slammed the door and we all ran back down the stairwell. On the way down, I suddenly remembered something! From a story I read as a child, these birds, they are..

weak to soda

So, as we entered the kitchen, Vince, that computer guy promptly tossed me a soda to defend myself with. My next brilliant idea was for us to push the tables against the door, but apparently Harpies don’t care about tables and doors. It was upon us almost as quickly as if there had been nothing in its way. Several shrieks and gunshots later, Vince and Murphy were strewn about, bleeding to death. And the bird.. The bird was dead on the ground. Thank god. When I reached to verify that it was dead, the damn thing melted into a puddle on the ground. All I wanted was a bit more evidence, so I scooped up some goo into a soda can.

I called the paramedics as soon as a could, and rode with Vince and Murphy to the hospital. We haven’t known each other long. But we just went through hell together, and that’s worth a lot more to me than months of idle chit-chat. Murphy was the only one conscious when we got to the hospital, and I had a chance to talk with a bit before I was so rudely interrupted. By my arrest. Murphy spoke up for me, to no avail, but the fact that he did says a lot about his character. Even if I was arrested anyway.

The arrest by procedure. I was taken in, questioned, stripped of my badge and gun. I had no excuses. How the fuck do you really explain a man sized bird trying to eat you? Needless to say, I’m no longer employed with the Chicago PD.

-Andrew

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Fucking Black Goo Monster

I’m going to kill that Weldeman guy first chance I get. Jesus christ, soda pop? I almost died because people were too busy getting soda pop to make molitovs or anything REMOTELY useful? Then I’ll take out that computer nerd for opening the door in the first place. I mean, the sound it made while the door was closed was enough to bring me back to worst nights in Africa. It didn’t sound anything like an invitation to open the door.

But before I do any of that, what in the hell was that thing? A flying black gooey harpy shouldn’t even exist, much less be killing the guy I’m supposed to protect in the middle of Chicago. And why that guy? He didn’t even want much of a security detail, so it’s not like he thought someone… or something, would be after him. And who was that blonde? Is she really that dumb… I know this guy’s grandpa has to be crazy as fuck, but her? It’s not like I’m going to leave my job to get involved in any of this nonsense.

-Murphy

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My Fucking Knee
Useless soldiers and old men with guns

It seems evident that I’m surrounded by incompetence. Recently I pulled a masterful and elegant hack on a local police station and even some impressive social engineering that was supposed to avert violent confrontation. The only thing Murphy, that daft soldier, needed to do was stall some dimwit for time but the god damn gorilla decides to tackle the guy. Should have been easy for a fucking hardened mercenary, right? We’ll this motherfucker manages to fail at subduing him not once but TWICE. So all hell breaks loose, we nearly lost a piece of key evidence, I got shot in the knee, that Greg guy was firing a goddamn cannon inside a police station and somehow, somehow we managed to make it out of there alive. I guess that Arthur guy isn’t as bad as I thought, he pulled off some crazy driving in the heat of the moment.

People are too messy, even when they are doing what you tell them.

Well, we’ve got two days until we meet with this Weatherby gal from the Cheiron Group, I’m off to research these little ‘cells’ my grandpa keeps talking about.

Vince Out

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The Cannon That Could

I was sitting in my cell, minding my own business, when I was told I had a visitor. Honestly, I was hoping it was either Vince or Murphy. I need someone to talk to about what has been going on recently. Even if I was still going to be imprisoned for “assaulting” them. But.. It wasn’t. Instead, I got a blonde who called herself Weatherby. Just Weatherby. She didn’t really offer much information to me. But she did leave the door open just enough for me to hear what she was talking about outside. I heard the word “omerto” or something. Though, it must be important because of the emphasis they were putting on it.

Shortly after, there was a blast through the one way mirror, and I decided to get the hell out of there. What I saw was pretty.. shocking. There were lab techs and cops fighting with each other and some asshole with a cannon. They looked like they were fighting over the can with the goo I scooped up. Kinda funny. If they wanted something from that bird, I still have that imprint of the feather. No need to fucking assault the precinct. When I examined the lab tech a little closer, it wasn’t just a cool guy. It was Vince. My conclusion: Vince and Murphy are idiots.

This is where it got intense. I decided to go with them once they got the can, and I was the one behind the wheel. I haven’t done much evasive driving before, and it wasn’t as easy as it looks in the movies. Somehow though, I was able to shake off the cops and we made it back to Greg’s apartment no problem. I don’t think I’ve had this much of a rush before. There is a huge difference in fleeing the cops and fleeing a giant man eating bird. One of these will kill you, and the other will deliver a pile of paperwork. And I would rather die than be stuck filling out paperwork forever.

-Arthur

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[Exp] Vince Keeps it Toghether
When The Going Gets Tough...
  • Vince is feeling limber recently, it’s as if all that running and shitty diving has stretched his muscles! (+1 Athletics)
  • Vince is not so afraid anymore, giant birds and police station assaults have made him a little more tough of mind… (+1 Composure)

Exp was: 11
Exp spent: 7
Exp left: 4

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Vegans Might Be On To Something

I do not know what the hell is going on with my life! Shit’s all wrong, man, all wrong. Tonight we went to the meeting with that cherion gal and she offered us a suitcase of money and at the same time extorted us by clearing our bank accounts to remain silent about the black goo bird incident. Of course we agreed, but not before we made it clear to them we aren’t some pushovers. There was another man there, Alberto was his name, I think… now we’re on a mission to dispatch some heavily armed government supersoldiers. I can only imagine they do this for their own amusement as who the fuck sends a bunch of ragtag misfits to fight the vastly superior forces of the establishment?! What is this, a JRPG? If so where’s my cool hair?

Anyway, when we were leaving the building we saw an explosion in the building, somewhere around the floor we were in probably. Arthur and Murphy went to investigate but honestly I was somewhat hurt and did not feel like investigating an explosion in a shady corporate front for some dubious organization dealing with the occult; so I did not follow them. After a while I heard some struggling sounds and someone saying they hated me, I was sad so I took a cab home and treated myself to a nice hamburger. The end.

Oh yeah, the hamburger tried to eat me! I squished his fucking overconfident buns into a pulp. These boots I’m wearing seem to be good for squishing stuff, I’ll try to remember that. I was still hungry so I ordered a truck full of pizza, the ordering it part went surprisingly well. Murphy and Arthur are still gone as I type this, as hurt as I am sentimentally I still hope they are ok.

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